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choosingchange — Counselling Sydney CBD

Your choice — The Ultimate Choice (is yours)

Your expectations can sometimes be your greatest hindrance.  This is the secret you have been wanting to know all your life.  And it has been with you all your life. 

Ultimate Choice...

Sounds pretty final doesn't it.  What if I don't take it?  Who will know?  Who will care?  Ultimately, you decide your life path and this page or any other self-help book or advice is simply there for you to choose to read, investigate, discover more or leave for another day.

Learning to let go your expectations (because they can hinder your life path) and focus on what you want (because you can create your own destiny) are the first steps to being the master of your domain.

Acknowledging your limitations and your negative thoughts and then letting that information go is the next step.  Once you accept that you may not succeed in your goal or ain or life purpose, once that has been acknowledged and owned, then you are ready to focus on that ultimate choice you have made.  You can now get on with living the journey toward whatever eventuates.

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Focus...

As long as you focus on your ultimate choice you are more likely to achieve it... rather than think about the ideas and thoughts and feelings that often accompany the big goal, that are mostly about assumptions around things that you think you will need to get to your goal.

Letting go of how you going to get what you want is crucial to the getting what you want. 

Focus on what you want and let your natural abilities take you on the journey toward that end.  IMAGINE THAT END RESULT.

This choosingchange attitude makes a hell of a difference to your day, your week, your month, your year, your life.  It is using your mind to manifest your successfully creating your life's desires.

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Trust...

This requires one thing — your ability to be able to facilitate the choosingchange principles...

• your mind holds the messages you send it,
• learn to let go your expectations,
• acknowledge your fears and negative thoughts,
• let those thoughts go
• focus on what you want, My Ultimate Choice,
• imagine that end result
• trust that you have the abilities that you need to get what you want,
• live in the hear-and-now, eschewing the what, why and wherefore,

Driving a car is not about remembering all the things you have to do to make the car work — starting the motor, putting on your seat-belt, adjusting the seat, looking around to see if the way is clear, releasing the brake, changing gear, using the accelerator. 

It is about forgetting all those individual things and putting into action a kind of universal knowingness about "driving a car".  If you worried individually about all those things listed you would end up up a lamp post quick smart.

Forgetting about the doing of things in order to make it work allows us to action the ultimate goal, putting your energy where it is most needed.  If you put energy into the things that you think you will need to get to where you want you are probably going to be worrying about all the things you will need to get together in order to get there. 

It sounds a bit like a riddle.  You have probably been thinking all your life about what you really want to do and my hunch is that you already have most of what you need to get it.  The task now is to be on the lookout for all that stuff so that—

WHEN IT COMES YOUR WAY, YOU ARE READY TO GRAB AND USE IT. 

I am asking you to trust yourself and in your abilities.  

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Emotions

Your emotional response to all the individual things in life, all the worries you  have, is simply  your (possibly, irrational and negative) beliefs or philosophy of life speaking.  (Louise: "Ohhhhh! We'll never get a park!"  ...and she never did, unless I was in the car.)   What do you think of when you decide you want something?  How to get it.  I say forget that and let your emotions work for you joyously rather than negatively.

We  REact to our emotional cues because of family, societal influences or other value based PARENTAL type influences.  Over time, as adults we learn to modify our parental and emotional influences and respond appropriately to the event or idea or feeling.   Over time we also can learn to let our gut instinct.  Louise had learned to err on the side of caution, think of all the things getting in the way of her getting a parking space and manifesting a street full of parked cars and no spaces.

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Loving

Being in love (in passion) with what you want is also crucial to achieving the ultimate choices you make.  Accepting that it loves you too (that it's right for you) makes it happen, makes it so.  Being consistent in the love you have for your ultimate choice is part of this step.

My experience tells me that some people laugh at other people's dreams, and at their own, as if they don't really believe they could be attained.   That's why I suggest calling the ultimate choice the reality.  By saying this differently you begin to see things differently... again choosingchange in the way you see things.  Focussing on the ultimate choice, the reality of that, and letting your natural instincts and abilities take you there... leaving you free to experience whatever comes your way.

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Letting go, freedom, living authentically

By letting go and enjoying these experiences (whatever happens) allows freedom a natural, authentic and present attitude to life... living in the here-and-now... loving the ultimate choice and letting the journey lead you joyously to it.

Of course, in order to let go and enjoy you natural abilities to lead you to the ultimate means... you must love and trust yourself.  

I love those moments when everything seems to be just right.  T

he sun and breeze are warm and refreshing, the park is filled with people all doing their own thing, a ball from one game lands in the center of a neighbouring group, it's good-naturedly chucked back.

For a moment the two groups unite and mingle then reform to resume their separate games, people laughing, some sitting quietly reading, someone is having a phone conversation over under a tree ... ("Darling, let it go, it's over, you deserve better..."... laughter).

One group of picnickers, rolling loudly a large metal barbecue along the path, everyone looks up to watch then as they pass.

A rowdy doubles tennis match on the courts in another corner of the park rises up over the noise, everyone having their Sunday bliss in the park. 

Oh, I forgot about my dog, Chaadi, visiting every picnic group for a free feed.  Bliss indeed.

Let go, live in the here-and-now, rest and trust in your abilities to take you on the journey to your loved ultimate choice.

Knowing your love and the essence of what is in your heart is the secret to attaining your ultimate choices.  If it is in your heart then it will be easy to live by these precepts and then whatever comes your way will be welcomed and welcoming.

You will enjoy whatever comes your way.  Being open to experience and trusting that there is some good to be found in everything you will live happily, and truly present in the moment.

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Creating your reality

As I write this I am aware that the above paragraph about the park was where I created my own reality.  I was getting increasingly annoyed with all the noise and people doing all that stuff as I was trying to write and think.  All that activity I perceived as distracting.  I even started talking out loud to try and get the person on the phone to shut up.  I was getting pissed off.

As I wrote it, I might add without thinking about it, all my anxiety vanished and the park became like an impressionist painting... restful, vibrant, exciting, interesting, peaceful.  Bliss.

I sat quietly continuing my writing and reading.  I created my own reality.  In actual fact, nothing in the park had changed, except my attitude.  choosingchange allows you to make what you want of your life. 

• I was frustrated and annoyed,
• I acknowledged it, 
• I let it go,
• I created my own picture out of what i wanted it to be.

I wanted a peaceful environment where I could concentrate and subconsciously, without realising it, I got what I wanted.  A few minutes, three minutes it took to write that paragraph.

I wonder if knowing you can do that as easily as I did will give you the sense of joy that I have.  With gratitude, accept your ability to get what you want in a state of complete freedom, with little effort, without pain, without  sorrow, without fear of failure.  Living without fear of failure is living knowing you may fail, that that is ok.  It is the path of absolute love of the self, love for whatever happens.  If you do the best you can to the best of your abilities you can do no more.

Focusing on your goal, ultimate choice and the end result allows your natural abilities to lead you.  You can ignore all the obstacles, mistakes, fears and doubts that might possibly block your journey.  Letting your subconscious do the work leaves you free to enjoy the moments of bliss you can create on the journey to your ultimate choice. 

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Ironing

If I think about having to clean my kitchen or do my washing and ironing I'll probably be a bit annoyed that I have to spend so much time on these mundane tasks.   However, if I focus on feeling smart and fresh in my newly washed and ironed shirt and feeling happy and  smartly dressed when I open the door to my therapy rooms in Sydney CBD, my attitude changes. 

I see myself happily sorting my clothes, selecting and pouring the powder in to my new washing machine, hanging them out to dry, ironing then as I listen to Julia Varady singing Gli Amore di Teolinda by Giacomo Meyerbeer, as I look out over the Sydney cityscape from my flat.  Once again I create my reality as I speak. (Call to order a copy from Michael's Music Room, (02) 9267 1351)

The power of your mind is just as effective as mine. choosingchange counselling theory allows you to do this for yourself, to effectively shape and action your own reality. 

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