BCHC, MCAPA ID. 3219, PACFA Reg. 20611
Philip is a Clinical Member of CAPA — the Counsellors and Psychotherapists Association, NSW) and is Registered with PACFA — the PACFA National Register of Psychotherapists and Counsellors.
Working with individuals, couples (marriage and de-facto, heterosexual, gay, bisexual and lesbian) interested in improving work and personal relationships from Sydney City CBD.
choosingchange counselling, psychological therapy, psychotherapy and coaching
Feeling confident helps establish an environment where obstacles and challenges are overcome more easily. A major part of the counselling process I employ is designed to give you greater confidence to help you understanding yourself and others leading to achieving independence, differentiation and maturity.
choosingchange … discover choices and explore ways to make changes.
Please call to ask questions about how I work or for other details or to make an appointment
- 0448 0281 251
- 1300 667 996
Or contact me by Email or use the Contact page
- Individual Counselling
- Couple, pre-marital
- Gay & Lesbian Counselling
- Conflict Resolution
- Gender Issues
- Life Coaching
- Grief and Loss
My experience supporting my education and training in counselling and psychotherapy(individual, relationship and marriage), helps me give you an edge that allows you to be the expert in your life — a safe, professional environment to consider options toward choosing changes in your life.
Counselling and psychological therapy is about gaining knowledge about yourself in order to better operate in the world. This can sometimes be about a specific issue, or more generally about the whole of your life.
Functioning well in the world of relationships (family, friends, loved ones, work colleagues…) makes life easier and exciting. This gives you a sense of wellbeing.
Understanding how you operate, what are your ways of seeing things, as well as having an understanding of how other people operate, means you are going to be better equipped to cope if you find yourself in difficult situations.
Sometimes people have difficulty understanding that what they want is not necessarily what other people want. Finding ways of compromising and letting everyone have their desires met (the win-win situation) is an important start on the road to better living.
Exploring the psyche and self is a most rewarding activity. During counselling, people often say they are just beginning their lives, or they feel re-born. Finding someone to help that process can be the start of an incredible journey. When you are ready to travel is when you begin that journey. You will know when you are ready.
From a position of “not knowing”
To explore what it means to be a man or woman, gay or straight, bisexual, happy, depressed, saddened, lonely, poor, rich, glad, mean, dirty, pure, sullied, unlucky… and the millions of other things that can swing through our minds each second (we process millions of thoughts per second)… to study these things is a way, I believe, of coming to an understanding of our world and our place in this world, this universe.
Socrates advocated to “…never cease to question why we believe what we do believe”.
Is there the faintest possibility that I may be wrong in my assumptions?
Are the assumptions that I am basing my decisions on to do things or believe things true?
If there is a possibility I may be wrong then I better be careful about what I do, based on these “wrongfully formed beliefs”.
I come from a position of not knowing
First of all this allows me the luxury of never being the expert. I am allowed to question everything, submit my ideas and beliefs and potential actions to survey and concern and fine examination to see if these idea/actions are a good “fit” for me.
In fact (and this is my philosophical and professional stance) you are the expert in your life. My job is to guide you and enhance you already current skills… and educate and enlighten where you feel things are not working well.
This is how I will be in the room with you. “Let’s talk about it,” I will say. You will choose the topic and you will determine the path we walk (talk).
Why see a counsellor?
You will know when you are ready to see a counsellor.
“The person is pretty much what he says he is.” (Hall & Lindzey, 1966, p.498)
Do you feel that you would like to —
- have a greater working relationship with your colleagues
- to make your personal relations more rewarding, smoother
- to embrace your close friends but find yourself drawing away?
- to make great friends with the people you meet?
Depending on what things you want to talk about will result in the kind of help provided. Most people like to learn assertiveness skills and like to feel a greater sense of self.
Many issues are discussed in counselling sessions. We all have a stories that were told to us by our parents and significant people in our lives that many of us hold onto for the rest of our lives as “mistaken beliefs” or myths that we feel we must adhere to in order to be “good people”.
Finding a way of having choices is the key to having a satisfying, fulfilling and rewarding life
- Relationship problems
- Self Esteem and Assertiveness
- Couple, Individuals and Family
- Grief and Loss
- Coaching for Life and Career
- Drug and Gambling and other Addictions
- Same-sex, gay and lesbian issues
- Sexuality and gender issues
- Gender roles
Counselling can help you find out how to make choices
If you find things you want unattainable what do you say to yourself? Some people have a belief that they will never succeed and so expect failure. They see failure at every turn.
Turning these thought patterns around so the expectation is success makes huge differences to their lives.
Counselling and psychotherapy can start this process and teach you to do this yourself.
The way people act is often the way they expect themselves to act. As children we assume things we are told by our parents are true. Only years later do we discover that there are other realities.
Are some of your ideas about people and life mistaken beliefs?
- Wanting to understand what your partner is saying and wanting your partner to understand you is crucial to getting on.
- Check out if they have really heard you when you speak to people. Repeat back what you think you heard when other people speak to you. Clarity is everything.
- Thinking irrationally can lead to irrational behaviour.
- People do not always do what we want.
- Learning how to cope with our unfulfilled expectations can make a difference to you outcomes and your life satisfaction.
All of us take on the expectations of society at large. Gay and Lesbian people can take on the expectations of society at large that are not appropriate. When they do this, heterosexist ideals can manifest unattainable goals, which can lead to despair.
Internalised homophobia indirectly influences self-esteem.
Couple therapy is designed to reintroduce integrity and intimacy into the relationship.
This is manifested through involving both people in a caring, considerate appraisal of all aspects of marriage — romantic, psychological, physical, and spiritual.
Being alone does not mean you need be lonely. Solitude can be a time for healing.
Learning relaxation techniques, walking, yoga and other calming exercises can help in bringing understanding around aloneness.
When you experience the feeling that being alone means you are unloved, unlovable or bad, I would urge you to challenge those feelings.
Nine-times-out-of-ten you will find you have many loveable qualities, often obscured by your own negative thoughts and actions.